…Brad and I got engaged. I had to use the calculator app on my phone to figure that out, I don’t keep track of how many years it’s been since x,y,z like he does. I don’t do math in my head, either. Not successfully, anyway.
Twenty-three years ago we met and started going out. Within a week, he wanted to look at rings. So we did. But the relationship was long distance, which he wasn’t good at, so… it didn’t last long.
I needed college classes that weren’t offered at the college I went to–not when I needed to take them, anyway–so that summer I moved to the city where he lived to take those classes (not because he was there, but because that’s where the University was located.) We had mutual friends which is how we met in the first place, and we all hung out some, but after a couple of weeks our mutual friends kind of got lost along the way and it was just us. We didn’t pick up where we left off though, we were just friends. I liked him, and knew he liked to hang out with me but that’s all it was.
A couple of months later, suddenly his attitude changed. He went from “we’re just friends, that’s it,” to “I love you.” Talk about mental whiplash. He was commitment-phobic though, I was well aware of that, so… when he wanted to go look at rings again, did I take him seriously? No. No, I did not. We did that several times during the month of July, and I took him less seriously each time.
So on August 4th twenty-three years ago, we were at the mall and he wanted to go look at rings. Again. I didn’t take him seriously at all. Until we were in the jewelry store and he pulled out his wallet and handed Ken, the jeweler, a wad of bills. I was stunned. I probably wasn’t quite as shocked as Anika was when she saw Miles for the first time and realized he was semi-transparent, but I was not expecting that.
So Ken the jeweler asked if Brad would like to pick up the ring later. I went from shocked-out-of-my-wits mode, to common-sense mode. I was also in I’m-your-friend-and-I’m-determined-to-stop-you-from-doing-something-stupid mode. Because I’m thinking… the man just handed you a ton of cash and you want the ring back? I don’t think so! He either walks out of here with the cash, or the ring, but he doesn’t walk out with neither.
Wouldn’t I like to be surprised with a romantic proposal though, they both wondered? I looked at them like they were crazy. It was a little late for that! How surprised can I be, knowing he bought the ring? Even Miles couldn’t take that scenario and turn it into something romantic! Well… fine. He probably could. But whatever, if that’s the way Brad wants it he can take the ring with him, he doesn’t need to leave it at the store. Seriously, how does that make sense! It doesn’t! At all! That’s what I was hung up on.
So we walked out of there and I was wearing the ring, and we were engaged. I was now out of common-sense-mode and in shock again. We went out to eat and I sat there shaking. I could not believe what just happened. I wasn’t quite sure what did happen! Maybe because he didn’t propose, and maybe because I never in my life thought I’d get more than mild entertainment from visiting all those jewelry stores with him.
He never did ask by the way, and I never said yes. But, four and a half months later we got married anyway.
that’s exactly what MY husband did! he said, “you’re not leaving this store without that ring on your finger.” i don’t care (anymore) that it wasn’t romantic, because i’ve decided it WAS. he wanted to have me for the rest of his life, he knew i’d say yes. i’ve had an amazing man for 13 years.